Sunday, August 28, 2011

What to do?

I'm frustratrated! I try not to worry about things and yet I can't help it. I try to remember that last year at this time the only thing that mattered the only thing I wanted was to feel good. Now, I worry about other things. One of my thoughts is... should I go back to work! We have always been a 2 income household. I have had a job since I was 16 yrs old. During my Summer breaks from the district I would work in retail or at an office. I don't think I want to go back to the school district. Although I miss my coworkers and the kids, I really miss the kids. I have so much I want to do...so many dreams. How do I know what I'm supposed to do next?! I know that this too will pass. I know that the Lord will show me what I need to be doing. I need to be still and listen. I have to have faith.

There is so much work involved in maintaining a house. There is only two (plus my furbabies) in this house! How do women who have a husband, kids, pets and a job do it?! I still don't know how I did it when I worked and went to school. I guess whatever got done got done and I didn't have time to worry about it. I've always liked keeping a clean and organized house. I get that from my Mom, who is a wonderful housekeeper. Does that sound bad? I mean, she did soo much, she raised six kids and she always had a clean house, clean clothes and hot, delicious meals for all of us. I don't know how she did it! Now I see how much she sacrificed for us and how hard she worked and continues to work.

John tells me the only thing I need to do is take care of myself and stay healthy. I'm trying but my head tells me I should be doing more. I want to start my own business. I want my love of decorating and crafts (my passions) to work for me. Maybe I should open an Etsy shop. Maybe, I just need to take a chance and try something new. How else will I know?! Should I find a job in an office or that pre-school close to the house? These are my thoughts and worries so early on a Sunday morning.

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